Clairvoyance Canned

I can predict the silly things in life so well. An anticipated phone call, a certain look or gaze, a 24-hour waiting period just to hear those 2 magic words. Lots of looking over the shoulder, incessant phone checking and a million trips down memory lane. I tell them all it's going to happen and when. And when it does we all laugh about it. But at the end of it all it's not enough. I don't want to predict the predictable and be at the receiving end of stuff that doesn't really matter. I want to erase everything - the memories, the songs and tunes, the names and people, the 2 whole sentences I can construct in a strange language, the whirlpool I get sucked into with just the mention of one word. I want to leave it all behind. Why was it so easy in the past and why the hell does it blow so much now?